By Jackline, Consulting Counselor

Working at Neema has been a learning experience for me. I have learned to love more, learned to become a better listener, a better counselor, a better wife and mother, and a better person to those around me. Seeing the young womens’ lives transformed has always given me the greatest joy, and seeing them smile melts my heart. I have learned that sometimes it is not just what is seen on the outside—a little more effort is needed to understand what one may be going through on the inside. I have learned that feelings are important, and it is okay to allow yourself to feel them. You may not rush to heal, but what is important is for one to not stay broken.

Jackline with a student in a counseling session

I have learned to embrace forgiveness and to continue to live in a healthy relationship even when it has not been easy—but God’s grace has been sufficient. I have also learned to love unconditionally, and this has helped me extend it to the young women at Neema and the people I encounter without passing judgment.

Below, is a recounting of one student’s story that has impacted me greatly.

I was raped by my step-father and got pregnant, but later lost the baby. My mother hated me so much and never wanted to hear from me, accusing me of seducing her husband. My step-dad threatened to kill me if I ever spoke up. I lived in pain and fear and was not happy because my mother saw me as an enemy and wanted nothing to do with me. I blamed myself so much and felt ashamed and dirty. My auntie rescued me by taking me to her place. But it did not stop my step-dad from looking for me and threatening me. But God was on my side, and my step-dad did not succeed. My aunt helped me find a place at Neema, and life has not been the same since I joined.

I have been able to share my pain which has lightened my heart so much. I’ve learned to forgive and was able to forgive my step-father. My auntie’s husband made me change the way I see men because he has loved me as a daughter and has treated me differently. Neema has made me feel joy and happiness in my heart, and I longer think about what happened to me, nor do I have nightmares about my child that I lost. I have hope, and most importantly, I have reconciled with my mother, and we are able to speak as mum and daughter. Prayer has helped me so much because I feel different. I feel at any given time I can share my story to encourage someone else. I now love myself, and my hope has been restored.

Letting it out and wanting to speak about her experience is incredibly brave and a necessary form of healing.

Counselors at Neema create a safe place to listen, offer crying shoulders to the students, and offer guidance and coping mechanisms to the young women in the daily experiences of life. We do trauma counseling at Neema to help our students to spiritually, physically, emotionally, and psychologically address their personal experiences and come to terms with and recover from traumatic events by becoming survivors and knowing their true identity and worth. Our students grow spiritually as their trust and hope in God is built over time. There is restoration and reconciliation with self and others. They learn to have healthy relationships. Most of them learn to love and accept love, and most importantly, they each attain a level of transformation which helps them thrive in the outside world.

Jackline (second to left) with Neema counseling team

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A Counselor's Perspective on Counseling at Neema