How the Loss of Students Affects Staff
The process of choosing girls to join Neema is a rigorous one. We advertise through the local chief, Mukasa (village elders), churches, and other networks. And we set aside two days for assessment, checking applicants against several vulnerabilities including extreme poverty, sexual and/or gender-based violence, teenage pregnancy, early marriage, HIV/AIDS and other health challenges, school dropout due the aforementioned reasons, and rejection by family.
During the assessment, the girls bring us several documents to confirm not only their identity, but also their need for what Neema offers. This includes a letter from their area chief and a letter from a pastor. If a girl is short-listed, the counselors make a home visit to meet the girl’s family and to conduct a follow-up assessment.
Despite the rigorous process to find girls who are a good fit for Neema, some don’t find Neema to be a good fit for them. Perhaps their guardians force them to apply or they have a lack of other opportunities. At times, this leads these applicants to drop out.
When a girl drops out of Neema, the effect it has on the staff is huge, because at Neema, we staff consider ourselves to be role models responsible for more than just skills enrichment. We strive to connect with the girls and reach them on multiple levels. We forge strong relationships, teaching them the important life lessons that will help them succeed at Neema and beyond. It’s not always easy to influence someone’s life, which is why it takes a great mentor to do so. But unfortunately, not all mentees want to keep on that road.
Program Director Winnie with a Neema alumni
When a student drops out, shock and disbelief are the first feelings to arise. You are in denial, hoping to come to work the following morning and still find them there. After that, you try bargaining, looking for ways to bring them back. But when you realize that they are indeed gone, guilt and discouragement overwhelm you. You wonder whether you failed them, whether or not you did all you could, whether or not you nurtured their strengths and helped them in their weaknesses. Once you realize you did do these things, anger sets in, because you feel like they’ve trampled on your love for them.
That anger, though, is replaced with fear—fear that they will regret their decision, that they will suffer ‘out there’, and that they will forget who you were to them and all you gave for them.
But eventually, acceptance takes root and you move on. You realize that there is nothing more you can do, so you pray for them and wish them well, knowing that even during their short stay at Neema, transformation started. And then you continue to work, concentrating on those who are still here, and remembering that the many successes always outweigh the setbacks.
Written by Winnie Kiunga, Neema Program Director